It's Just One of Those Days...

Today was one of those days where I didn't even get dressed until 3:30 p.m. These days seem to be happening more frequently. Don't judge me; at least I actually did get dressed for a few hours today! :)

Bryson and I made three pans of fudge. I folded three loads of laundry. I felt so proud of myself for accomplishing these tasks that I ordered Papa John's pizza for dinner! Again, don't judge. At least I got one with lots of veggies on it.

The pregnancy nausea and total lack of energy has set in, along with a ridiculously round belly for only 9 weeks. I guess on number three, my body is just saying, "Oh yeah. Here we go again. I'll just go ahead and pop out there like I know I'm gonna have to do eventually."

Christmas is only a few days away, and I'm hosting the Hoskins' family Christmas Eve get-together, so I'm trying to pace myself and slowly get the things done that I need to do (thus the 3 pans of fudge I made today). In my typical OCD way, I even made a list Saturday outlining each day with things I need to do. Phillip laughs at me, but I'm a goal-setter and a list-maker. Even more so now, I need a list to keep me moving. Yesterday, grocery shopping was on my list. So, I dutifully made my way to Kroger. I was actually feeling pretty good prior to going, but the longer I shopped, the worse I started to feel. My stomach suddenly felt empty, and when my belly gets empty, the nausea gets SO much worse. So what does the crazy pregnant lady do? I go to the deli and order an 8 pc. fried chicken dinner (because I wanted hot food), checked out as quickly as possible, and then as soon as I got Avery and my groceries loaded in the van, I dug into my chicken. I ate the biggest piece in there, and it was delicious! Then I drove home, and told Phillip what I did. Of course, he laughed at me like I'm insane. Maybe I kind of am.

I love Christmas time, but this year I'm kind of feeling like, enough already. Let's get this over with and move on. Yikes, I sound like Scrooge. However, I am looking forward to the excited looks on the kids' faces and spending time with family. It truly is the most wonderful time of the year!

Not sure if I'll write again before Christmas, so I want to wish you a very Merry Christmas! May God bless you and yours!

A Few of My Favorite Things

"Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens..."

While I like that song, I just have to disagree with the lyrics. Really?? Whiskers and kettles aren't what make me smile. Yeah, I get it; the theme of the song is that it's the ordinary, everyday things that make our lives full and wonderful, and with that, I can agree!!
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Brothers who love each other more than anything in the world.

Big cheesy grins from my three favorite guys.

Bryson's amazement at the beautiful snow.

Avery's new trick...sticking his thumbs in his ears :).


Bryson doing so well in his Christmas program and his excited waves to us in the audience every few minutes.

These are a few of my favorite things!! I know it doesn't rhyme, but at least it makes a lot more sense.

My Pregnancy Grumblings

"If you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all." That is the motto I was raised to adhere to and also explains why I haven't blogged lately.

It took about a week for the shock to wear off about our pregnancy news. During that time I had slight moments of nausea. Let me just tell you, they have gone from slight to severe and almost constant. Last Sunday morning was the first day I woke up feeling really yucky, and as I rolled over to sit up, I was like, "Yep. This is it. This is what I remember feeling and why I vowed to never have another baby." It seems like each day the nausea is getting stronger, and it seems to be most severe at night, which means I get very little sleep. It also means that I have a bag of chips and glass of lemonade on my table by my bed for a middle-of-the night snack to attempt to relieve the nausea. I have gained ten pounds already from sick-eating, because unfortunately, eating is the only thing I have found to take the edge off. I eat when I don't feel hungry and food doesn't even sound good. I don't remember it being this bad with my last two, definitely not Avery.

Another thing is that my life cannot revolve around this pregnancy. I now have two little boys that require lots of attention, so even though I don't feel like it, in a few minutes they'll be up needing breakfast, changed, and gotten off to preschool. I'd rather just lay on the couch under a warm blanket, but that just isn't an option. Phillip has been sympathetic, but he works third shift and sleeps through the day, so there's only so much he can do. I'm already becoming more of a homebody than ever. The last two nights Phillip has taken Bryson and gone out to a viewing, a church-working, and a graduation party, and I have stayed home on the couch. Somehow I must muster up the energy to finish my Christmas shopping. This is a bad time of year to feel terrible. I need to clean my house for company, go grocery shopping for baking, actually do some baking, wrap presents, attend school programs, and the list continues. We also need to take a trip to KY for a family Christmas, and the mere thought of getting into a vehicle and riding that long makes my stomach heave.

I'm having my first ultrasound tomorrow, and then am scheduled for another one in January to measure the neck and check for abnormalities like Avery. I'll feel SO much better when I'm told everything looks normal. That should also be around the time when the nausea is starting to ease some. So, I just must keep my thoughts focused on the future and getting through this rough patch.

I guess I've done enough complaining for one post. I will try not to make it a habit!!

Baby on the Way!!

I just want to share some exciting news! We found out yesterday that we're going to be having another baby in July. If you happen to be reading this, you may be like some others who gasp in shock and then tell us we will have our hands full. And we know we will. Or others who think that having another baby when we have two pretty high maintenance kids already is irresponsible. But we hope you all will just be happy for us and pray that the Lord will bless us with a healthy baby. That is our greatest desire right now.

I guess we have something else to add to our list of reasons to be thankful this holiday season!!

God Bless,
Bethany

Giving Thanks

This is the time of year that we officially set aside to give thanks for our blessings. I try to be thankful everyday, but on Thanksgiving Day, we make more of an effort to be with some of the people that we're so blessed to have in our lives and offer thanks together. If anything, this year I have learned that life is so fragile, that a good day can become a bad one so quickly, and that we must cherish the time we have with our loved ones. I, like many others, have an abundance of things to be thankful for!

First, I'm thankful for my little family: Phillip, Bryson, and Avery. We're an interesting group, that's for sure. We all have our flaws and imperfections, but we love each other more than life! I'm beyond blessed to be able to stay home with my boys.

Secondly, I'm thankful for my extended family and in-laws. What an amazing support system I have! And I have two sisters that are my best friends in the world. I don't want to take any of them for granted; I only wish we were able to spend more time together. Right now we're all healthy, and that is a HUGE blessing!

Next, I'm thankful for my husband's job! Security is a high priority for me. Phillip's job loss over the summer hit me hard, more emotionally than financially because I am such a worry-wart. Of course, God took care of us. But I'm so thankful that he is employed and has good insurance, which is so important with a kid like Avery.

I'm also thankful for our home, which my husband has so beautifully remodeled. And our automobiles...even the minivan :).

I guess those are all of the "big" things, but I'm thankful for all the "smaller" less typical things as well. I have a great part-time job that allows me to teach a couple nights a week when I want; Avery has made some progress developmentally - not much - but some; Bryson is thriving in preschool and becoming such a sweet little boy; our church has had a lot of great services lately; although I don't get to spend much time with them, I have many great friends. Most of all, I'm thankful for salvation and God's mercy!

I could write the world's longest blog ever by continuing to list my blessings, but I guess I'll stop. May you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday!
~Bethany

These Are the Days

These are the days where a good night's rest is no longer in my vocabulary, nor is it an expectation, and my house is never quite clean even though it seems I clean up an awful lot of messes.

These are the days when I hardly recognize the woman with the dark circles and tired skin staring at me in the mirror, and where I spend my time comparing prices on grocery items rather than browsing a clothing store...and my wardrobe will vouch for that!

These are the days when I feel like a circus act juggling appointments and busy schedules, like a failure when my overactive four-year-old misbehaves, and completely helpless when Avery is sick.

These are the days when my back aches from all the tugging and lifting of my son with special needs, and my bath time is usually interrupted by a little red-head shouting, "Mom-mmmyyyy!"

These are the days when we do a lot more eating at home than we used to, and we choose our restaurants by their child-friendliness.

These are the days when I feel like my brain has turned to mush from spending the majority of my time interacting with toddlers, and I only dream of spending quality time with my husband.

But these are the days when I realize time is going by way too fast, and if I could only slow it down, I would, and I can't help but feel pride and unexplainable love looking into my two little boys' eyes.

These are the days when my college degrees and career mean absolutely nothing in comparison with spending time with my children, and living on a tight budget is a sacrifice I'm willing to make.

These are the days when sticky hugs and drool-ly kisses make my heart melt, when conversations with Bryson make me laugh, and seeing Avery's perfectly innocent smile and hand claps make me want to scoop him up and never put him down.

These are the days when I have developed an even deeper love for my husband as the father of my children.

These are the days that will become memories that I will cherish for the rest of my life, and I know that what I will remember won't be the sleepless nights, out-of-style clothing, and tight budget. I am BLESSED beyond imagination to get to spend this time of my life with the precious family that God has given me!

My Thoughts on a Quiet Morning!

I'm going to take advantage of this quiet morning to post some of the goings-on around here and a few of my muddled thoughts! We're already over a week into November; I just can't believe how quickly this year is wrapping up.

I'm heading to Indiana for a few days this weekend. Veteran's Day gives Avery a day off school and me a night off from teaching, so the boys and I are gonna pack up and go visit Mom and Dad. I'm really looking forward to it, and I know my mom is too!

The holidays are approaching, and I think the Hoskins' side of my family is in some ways dreading them. I always love this time of year, but I am reluctant to celebrate without Carolyn. It's going to be tough, but by God's grace, we'll make it through. I'm thankful that for the last couple of years since she's been sick, we made sure we were home for the holidays rather than traveling to/from my parents. I've got some great pictures and memories that will last a lifetime. Last year she wasn't feeling up to cooking, and I tried my hand at making fudge for our get-together. The recipe I used flopped (or maybe it was the cook!), so I gave her a call and got her recipe. I was able to make two batches pretty easily. I'm glad that I took the time to get it from her. Regardless of where the recipe came from, it will always be "Carolyn's fudge," and I think I'll give it a try again this year. A few days ago, Bryson and I stopped for a visit at the cemetery. While I want Bryson to remember Mammaw Carolyn, I'm also careful in the way that I talk about her because he gets upset. When we got out of the van and started walking toward her grave, he said, "Mommy, is she still dead?" Of course I told him yes. Then he said, "She's buried under the dirt, Mommy!" Then he spread his arms wide like he was a superhero and started running toward the little mound of dirt. He said, "Don't worry, Mammaw. Bryson's going to save you!" Then he said, "Let's get this dirt off of her!" Poor guy. It's a tough thing to explain to a four-year-old. He ended up leaving a Frankenstein Halloween sticker for her that he was confident she would like. I have no doubt that coming from one of her grandkids, she would have loved it.

We've been enjoying an "Indian summer" for the last few days with temps in the upper 60's. It has been lovely, and Bryson has been enjoying the outdoors once again. Avery has been going to school, clapping his hands, and doing what he does best, SMILE! He's also had a difficulty with this time change, or at least that's what I'm blaming his difficulty going to bed the last few nights on. Shew, I hope he gets through this soon!

Personally, I've been thinking a lot about ways that I can reach out to others. I feel like over the last two years especially, so many people have reached out to us and I haven't given back at all! Phillip said something in his preaching the other night about God saving us to serve, not to sit. That has really stuck with me and reminds me of what another preacher once said about we can either be a sponge or a spring. I definitely want to be a spring; I definitely want to serve! Of course our first obligations lie with service to God and our family. As other busy mothers out there would agree, sometimes it's easy to stop right there! I get so busy with proper discipline of Bryson, spending quality time with him, changing & feeding Avery, taking him to his scheduled therapies and appointments, and getting us all to church on time three services a week...sometimes serving others just doesn't happen! So, I've been making a real effort for the last couple of weeks to reach out. I'm not able to do much, but I've been trying to just call and check on someone who I know has gone through something, send a few cards, and cook a meal for a friend. That Casting Crowns song, "If We are the Body" is one of my favorites, and it's words are so powerful!
If we are the body
Why aren't His arms reaching
Why aren't His hands healing
Why aren't His words teaching
And if we are the Body
Why aren't His feet going
Why is His love not showing them there is a way
There is a way

I don't want to get so wrapped up in my own busy personal life that I forget there's a world out there that's hurting too. I can't really do anything about the whole world, but I CAN reach out to those around me. Lord, open my eyes and heart to those who need you!

That pretty much sums up my thoughts and activities recently! I better make the most of what is left of this quiet house! Until next time...
~Bethany